But I can't knit.
I could crochet one.
But I can't be bothered.
What to do?
Why, CHEAT, of course!
Next, draw a monster-ly template and cut out 2 pieces from your knitted thing.
With wrong sides together, sew around the edge, but not all the way - leave a small gap for stuffing later (remember, wonky sewing is very necessary- monsters are not pretty).
Now turn out the right way.
Experiment with different 'looks' for your monster with things from your stash.
Attach whatever to your monster. I stitched mine, but glue would be easier.
Stuff and sew closed the opening.
Admire your cleverness.
If you are truly naughty, tell people you knitted it yourself.